The Beginning...

The Beginning...

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Ancient Definitions and Abilities

[<-----Mr. Sollywood at six, so adorable]
I have been thinking lately of womanhood and motherhood. How the first can flow so seamlessly into and around the second. Right now I am definitely in the womanhood stage, trying desperately to cling to the girlhood stage. However the longer I am married and the more I set goals the more I leave behind my childish fancies and take up the noble mantle that is ours to hold and carry. The opportunities and abilities women possess and the amount we can accomplish is exhilarating. It is amazing to me that so few women really understand the potential that we have. The influence that is ours whether we want it or not. That is the part that brings tears. I see those women around me who influence without knowing and would be so shamed to see how they mold the lives around them. I see some of that in myself sometimes.
Good men, I have found, are drawn to good women and want to be influenced for good. (Is it influence then?) I include the picture of Mr. Sollywood because he is one of those men. There are however women around me who are worthy of the title 'Goodwife' an olde term which sadly fell out of use somewhere between the eighteenth and nineteenth century. It is a title of respect given to some women within a community who encompass all the qualities of virtue and nobility which women are capably of possessing. I recently wrote a paper on midwifery and women in early North America and it is from there that these musings have stemmed.
The gentle role of wife and the noble role of mother have been so innate in women for so long that I have to laugh at myself. I am usually a logical rationally minded woman. Modern even. I analyze most of my thought prior to action and act accordingly, which outwardly seems good and progressive however inwardly it sometimes leaves me feeling empty... it is here that my musings have led me.
I, Mrs. Sollywood, have the ability to follow the spirit of these women. The spirit which they were led by and which allowed them to be Goodwives. And goodmothers (that term I just made up, call it a literary license.) Somethings the promptings of this spirit seem irrational, it is fine when they are. There is nothing in the above that means I can't have the career I've always wanted, or to travel around the world or live in a different country every few years. I can be as well educated and bold as I please. BUT I can't ignore the spirit. I can't ignore the important things like gentle words, and soft rebukes, thoughtful actions, and slowness to anger, loving tenderness, and mothering, whether I am a mother or not. I found this bit of poem, A mother is speaking of her daughter...

her limbs lengthening by the day
her health filling our home

that she came from my body!
a memory so huge I forget day to day

- for if I remembered that roundness,
that sever pressing, that ancient definition of woman

I am so happy for all those around me who are entering into the motherhood portion of life, and I hope they don't forget about their womanhood. I have to figure out how to master womanhood before Mr Sollywood and I consider motherhood/fatherhood. (Don't get all excited and ahead of yourselves here) I need to learn to follow that ancient spirit. Hold that mantle. Act on my exhilaration. Be a gentle influence.

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